I am convinced, as of late, that if you want to come in contact with the Holy Spirit, go hang out in the vitamin aisle of Walmart.
He’s right there, between all our man-made ways of sustaining our health, waiting.
Ever find yourself in a conversation and feel like you missed the first half somewhere? That’s how I met Tony. I’m pretty sure he dropped me in a conversation he was having in his head long before I ever turned into the vitamin aisle to find kids’ gummy vitamins and iron. We’ve been talking in our Bible study about being intentional. People are hurting all around you, and sometimes all you can do is be that ear to listen. Tony was hurting. He was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and was preparing his final wishes. As I stood there listening to his story, I heard that whisper, “You’re going to pray for him.”
“How, Lord? He hasn’t stopped talking.”
“He’ll stop talking when you start praying.”
After twenty minutes of working up the courage to ask, and trying to find a polite spot to interrupt, I got my opportunity, “Can I pray for you?” Tony immediately stopped talking, bowed his head, and received a very raw, very shaky prayer from me.
When I said amen, Tony looked at me and said, “I never asked for healing.”
“I know,” I said, “healing comes in all forms.”
“I don’t know why I’m still here,” he responded.
Tony is hurting, but he was such a blessing to me because he is not alone in wondering that. I have also asked, “Why am I here? What is my purpose?“
“Jesus said, ‘Everyone who drinks this water will get thirsty again and again. Anyone who drinks the water I give will never thirst—not ever. The water I give will be an artesian spring within, gushing fountains of endless life.’” (John 4:13-14)
There’s this beautiful song by Olivia Lane called “Woman at the Well” where she sings: “tonight I feel just like the woman at the well, wondering how someone could love me when I can’t love myself, but you want me as I am and that sounds crazy, I guess maybe that’s why grace is so amazing.”
If you think God can’t use you because you are too broken, too sinful, too dirty, too uneducated, too tongue-tied, too young, too old, too sick, too crippled, too whatever – let me just stop you and say you’re wrong. He can. He will. He’s done it before. And there’s nothing He loves better than doing it again.
The woman at the well had been discarded five times, divorced by five different men, and was living with a man who wasn’t her husband. She was broken. She was full of shame. She was a pariah. She was getting water in the middle of the day because she was not accepted. She was avoiding ridicule and judgment. She was drawing her water in the middle of the day when it was the hottest, because the discomfort of the elements was more tolerable than her community. I imagine she sat at that well, wondering, “Why am I still here?”
Friends, Jesus saw her. He chose her. She was the first person outside of his disciples that he told that he was the Messiah, because he knew that, despite her past, despite her brokenness, despite her shame, she would be his image bearer, and she would go and proclaim the good news to anyone who would listen. Jesus knew why she was there. He knew her purpose.
“Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, ‘Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did…’” (John 4:28-29a)
She left her water jar…
“Staring at that empty bottle, I swear I caught a glimpse of Him. He met me right there at the bottom and turned that wine to living water, and taught me how to love again.” (Olivia Lane)
“I don’t know why I am still here.”
The statement has hung with me. What I wish I had the opportunity to tell Tony was that you are here for me. You are here for your son. You are here for your daughter. You are here for the next stranger you meet in the vitamin aisle at Walmart. And I am too. And so are you, friend. Because you are God’s greatest resource. You are His image bearer. You are His conduit to get His living water out to those who are lost in the darkness. To those who are hurting. To those who need to hear the good news. Your purpose is simple: be present. Be available. Be willing.
“Just like the story from the Bible I heard when I was a girl, I’m the broken-hearted woman who met the Savior of the world.” (Olivia Lane)
